查看完整版本: 笑话五则

笑话五则

1
有一首歌，坑了大家十几年了，不信你唱唱：“你挑着担，我牵着马。。。。”回想下西游记里的分工，沙僧挑着担，悟空带路，谁牵着马？

评论：以后再唱这首歌的时候要注意了，谁唱谁是八戒了

2
上大学那会，学校通报批评了一个夜不归宿的童鞋（通报是贴在木质展板上的）。第二天展板上空空如野，学校也没直接证据就是该同学撕的。无奈，只好再帖，第二天又没有了，如此反复。学校有点毛了，用特大字又写了一边，下边还标注：再撕者开除学籍！第二天——展板没了.

评论：学校和这哥们都够执着的

3
   某日，楼下小超市卖酸奶，一箱30块钱并赠送儿童用折叠塑料桌椅。
　　我：“这桌椅挺好，单卖吗？”
　　老板：“卖！”
　　我：“多少钱？”
　　老板：“30块钱，赠你一箱酸奶……”

评论：这不是一个样子么，买奶送桌椅，买桌椅送奶，价格还一样

4
某男一日闲来无事，去公园找乐子，遇见一算命先生，遂上前问卦。算命先生盯着某男良久，道：“你是两个孩子的父亲。”某男轻蔑的伸出三个指头“那是你以为，我是三个孩子的父亲！”算命先生停顿半刻，轻蔑地说道“那是你以为！”

评论：那是你以为，算命先生这句话说的还真给力。

5
一个学阿拉伯语的同学，长的也有点像那边的人......
一次开车，不小心闯了红灯，交警就上来了，那小子一申脑袋，BLABLABLA一串阿拉伯语，交警就懵了，比划了半天也没弄明白，眼看后面车堵长龙了，交警说，算了，你走吧，那小子喜姿姿的点火挂档，交警一把摁住了，别的听不懂这就听懂了？给我下来！！！

评论：什么叫乐极生悲，这就是个活生生的例子。

突然发现我原来早承认自己是猪八戒了。

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1.其实谁唱谁是蒋大为
2.人家没有撕 所以不能开除...
3.这套可好用了 真有上当的呢

1.蒋大为在戏里演了猪八戒？
2.学校就不能让让嘛，这好，连公共财产都丢失了．
3.营销有道，捆绑销售．
4.我想这哥们回去这一夜肯定睡不着．
5.所以说，演戏要演全套，你看，演了一半不演了不就穿邦了．